Twilight, Twilight, Twilight. Will we ever get enough of the popular vampire series? Of course not! The Harvard Lampoon staff announced today that on Nov. 3, it will release “Nightlight,” its first parody novel in 40 years. Now Twi-hards, before you grab your torches and pitchforks, take a moment to hear what its all about! According to the Vintage release, Nightlight stakes at the heart of what makes Twilight tick…or, really, cuts to the core of it…. Brooding and hilarious, let Nightlight be your guide through the Twilight fandom that has eclipsed the mind of every teenager you have ever met. It follows a “pale and klutzy” girl named Belle Goose, who moves to Switchblade, Oregon, and meets Edwart Mullen, a “super-hot computer nerd with zero interest in girls.” The vampire-obsessed Belle becomes convinced Edwart is one of the undead after witnessing events she considers otherworldly (”Edwart leaves his Tater Tots™ untouched at lunch! Edwart saves her from a flying snowball!”).
Yeah, I’m pretty sure that if “Nightlight” is ever adapted for a film, it will not star Robert Pattinson or Kristen Stewart. The last parody published by the Lampoon was the “The Lord of the Rings” spoof “Bored of the Rings” in 1969. That means the Harvard gang is putting “Twilight” writer Stephenie Meyer in the company of J.R.R. Tolkien. That’s quite a compliment if you ask me. However, I’ve seen quite a few other “Twilight” parody novels out there, and the humor in them seems about the same as this one. I think I’ll skip this one… Do YOU think you’ll read it?