OMG, why did I spend all those hours pretending to pay attention in science classes when I could have just tuned in to Bill O’Reilly and gotten all the answers about everything in under two minutes? I HAVE WASTED MY LIFE!
When you can’t actually report news like it’s your, you know, job , the second best option is usually to harass an Oompa-Loompa at her book signing. What I find most amusing is not that Mr.