Tags archives: short-story



Autocowrecks: I’d Slide That

I know the designers intended to mean something completely different, but isn’t the “slide to unlock” function usually reserved for zippers on that part of the body? And what kind of sick bastard would put zippers on someone’s underwear?


WIN!: All in One Breakfast Machine WIN

I know I’m going to ruin a perfectly good picture of the world’s most glorious all-in-one breakfast device by putting words underneath it, but my enthusiasm can be stayed for no longer! This is the contraption that I require to make my breakfast-making dreams complete. It is what haunts my every waking hour as I pour a measly bowl of cereal on a frigid Monday morning. NAY – It is what I imagine coming down the mountain from the east after the first light on the fifth day to save me from morning fatigue.